Singaporean men are good at a lot of things – being dads, filing taxes, figuring out the best route to weave in and out of an IT fair in Suntec City… But there are some things, however, that Singaporean men are infamously bad at, and the evidence is easily apparent: their sense of style – or the lack of it.
Things that don't fit right
Singaporean men are not the only culprits – a lot of men take a good, heaven-sent attribute, like the fit of clothes, and exaggerate it to preposterous proportions. On top of the fact that they’ve decided their shirt tails should hang out, they’ve also picked a shirt big enough for two people to sleep in.
How many times have you seen a man sashaying down Orchard Road in a pair of skinny jeans so tight you could name his man bits? Or the opposite end of the spectrum, with men who look like they’re not wearing shirts, but instead, a short dress paparazzi-flashing Lindsay Lohan would approve?
Do these guys a favour if you’re friends with them – help them buy something in their size.
Here’s the truth: you do not look cool with your collars popped. You look like an overgrown frat boy who’s trying too hard to get laid. And you're probably not getting laid either. This collar-popping phenomenon started in 1929 when René Lacoste, the French seven-time Grand Slam champion, designed a cotton shirt that he would wear with its collar turned up to block the sun from his neck when playing tennis. In a time where sunblock is available at Watson’s for $5.90, you don’t need to pop your collar to block the sun.
Wearing sunglasses indoors or at night
Comedian Larry David put it best… “You know who wears sunglasses inside? Blind people and assh*les.” Unfortunately, a lot of Singaporean men do that. Whether it’s just simple laziness of putting back your sunnies where it belongs, or feeble attempt at looking cool, wearing sunglasses indoors or at night is probably one of the most wrist-slitting fashion mistakes you can make.
Carrying women’s bags
There is a line between being gentlemanly, and being completely stupid. Carrying your wife’s or your girlfriend’s $4,000 Chanel bag that you’ve paid for on her birthday falls into the latter category. Carry her shopping bags, open doors for her, but draw the line at carrying her designer handbag. This clip from The Noose demonstrates exactly how we feel about this fashion faux pas:
We understand your undying passion for Manchester United Football Club, we just don’t understand why you have to declare that love all the time. There are a lot of other things you can wear – like t-shirts, or shirts that are not scarlet red and emblazoned with the logo of a multi-billion dollar insurance company. If somebody’s advertising is on you, it only makes sense to have them pay you, not the other way around.
Down-to-there v-neck shirts
A sight more commonly seen in clubs like Tantric, or straight men who think they're god's gifts to women, v-neck tshirts that go all the way down to your navel are not sexy. Here's a rule of thumb - your neckline should not be lower than your girlfriend's.